lust

Shattered Hope

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Episode Finale 
I stare at my boss in confusion and sympathy, I have no idea how the accident is related to me or her. 
“There are no survivors,” She begins, “It was an head-on collision, apparently the trailer lost control and the driver of the private car was immersed in his iPad, he didn’t see the trailer on his path until it was too late.” She finishes. 

I could clearly picture the horrific scene, spilled with blood. I close my eyes in shock as nausea threateningly rises. My unborn baby doesn’t agree with the vivid picture. I part my lips to take in steady breaths, after a few breaths the nausea subsides. I wonder why she is telling me about the accident. 
“Deola,” She calls out.

I stare at her response, noting the sympathy in her eyes. I wonder why she feels sympathetic towards me. 
“How are you feeling?” She ask. I blink in surprise. “I know you are pregnant,” She answers my unasked question. I smile and lower my eyes in appreciation. The thought of my unborn baby fills me with unexpected joy. 

“I don’t know how else to break this news to you,” She begins as apprehension crawls over me. I wait for her to finish, my heart beats fast.
“Your husband was involved in the accident,” my eyes widens uncontrollably. “He didn’t make it.” 
I feel the heavy weight of darkness descend upon me and drag me down as I succumb to the tug of helplessness.

“I am so sorry,” I hear the voice say as blackness swallows me and the floor welcomes me. 

Months Later

I walk along the beach, taking a breath of freshness. The past few months have been hectic and frighteningly unbearable. 
I lost the baby a few weeks after Lanre’s burial. It was a double blow… losing my husband and baby within a few weeks. I went easily from being a married woman to a widow. 

His parents whirled me away for a much needed vacation after the truth came tumbling into light. 
Tears slips down my face as I think about how my life would have turned if Lanre had lived. 
Would we still be together or divorced? Would our baby have brought the healing we both needed?

Regrets burn as I thought about the words I never said to him… the silent words that revolved around my head. Maybe, it’s for good. 

I continue my leisure stroll along the deserted beach as the sun sets slowly. 

THE END

#Chronicles of an abused wife.
#Written by Mercy Okusun 

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Guest post: The call up

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I’m thankful, that you have showed me
how weak I’d been but I’d never admit. 
I’m grateful, for I comprehend how much I owe you, 
for making me learn to turn my curse to a tool.

I appreciate the fact, you never wished me good, 
for all the inflictions you put me thru’, 
for you thought you only belittled a fool
but the more you hit, the stronger I grew. 

I’m thankful, for your cheerless grim.
Without it I wouldn’t have been able to see
and know what peace my imaginations could bring, 
neither would I have known, I’m all I needed to be me. 

I’m thankful, for being there to provide necessary harassment,
when I brood in pain and whine in silence. 
I’m thankful to you, for upholding my turbulence
and making me discover, the strength in silence. 

Written by: Oluwadamilola Yusuf  

Guest Post-Ambushed 

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Miss Queen strode in, her beauty was priceless. Her face, well lit as though she was a princess,

she stared into my soul with her eyes of ruby. Eyes of a demon, eyes of treachery. 

She took my hand in hers, it was cold as ice, an eerie smile on her face, sent a chill down my spine.

Her lips were alluring but her intentions, evil. She peered through my eyes, the urge to kindle.

In a moment we were together, in the dead of the night. Though darkness lurked around her face shone bright. 

She was an exquisite being, she owned such a gleam. I could never resist, but she was death deep within. 

I sensed danger but wanted to remain with her, she asked for a kiss and I could’ve turned down the offer.

But I did not and she had the chance to rip out my heartand because she was a demon, left me to die. 

Written by: Oluwadamilola yusuf

Guest Post- NIGHT AT SUNRISE

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Maybe, I should take a dive off the cliff,

Probably you would save me from hitting the ditch,

Oh, maybe I should prove to you I’m still a fool

Stick my tongue in, keep my face lit

Pretend I’m supportive of every evil thing you do

Maybe not. 

’cause no drop of good dwell in you, 

You saw in me nothing but a tool to use 

Haul yourself from the pain around, 

Elevate yourself from the abased clans in your quest to, fetch for yourself, a worthless Crown,

So much lies on your path, telling the truth was never your plan, 

When you, make me go blind, take up my hand from behind  and make your, psychopathic parasites pierce through me with their tiny fangs 

I’m scared but this time I’m taking it upon myself so go ahead, 

Cook up the threats, bring all your friends if you’ve ever got any bit of strength.

I hated hating you,  and you never loved me either,

I was scared of having you but you said you’d find peace with no other.

You made the greatest fool out of me, 

Owing myself an apology, but I’m thankful to you, showing me things I’ve never seen.

It’s not difficult, turning back to forgive you, 

But you made me hate you and I hope you know I still do. 

Written by : Oluwadamilola David yusuf

Guest Post: WALKERS

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You’re such a wonderful beast, 
You either bring trouble or add to my needs. 

When I needed you the most, then would you flee, 

it had always been love, now I can’t tell what I feel. 
You used to be the radiant sun, 

You shone for light but now you burn, 

and yes you claim to be the Holy one 

while we both know you are but a scum. 
You said true love was all you felt, 
I think you placed me under a spell, 

but right now I can boldly tell, 

even a voodoo won’t move my pen.
I knew you would never admit your guilt,

whether or not, I still wish you peace

’cause no one could teach me better than you did, 

You’ve been such a wonderful beast. 

Written by: Oluwadamilola David Yusuf

SHATTERED HOPE-THE PAST

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Episode 2Three months later

We have been married for over two months now and — I just found out I’m pregnant, the obvious result of the rape. 

God, I feel so ashamed. My voyage as a wife has been bumpy and humiliating.

He repulses me now, every time he tries to touch me I feel like throwing up — the baby could be the reason behind it though. I dread telling him about my pregnancy because I don’t know how he would react. 

He usually has this spell of black moods, it is ill-advised to go close to him when he is in that mood.

He has been possessive ever since we got married, sometimes, he is charming and attentive. He thinks I would go file a complaint at the police station or human right activist.

 I chortled at that thought; who would believe a husband raped his wife? You are shocked too, right?

I burst out in laughter before realizing I was in the conference room with some potential clients, I blinked rapidly and the laughter died down suddenly as I felt curious eyes on me.

 This was not the time to unleash my domestic problem, I realized. I cleared my throat and gathered my thoughts into the domestic folder in my head. I smiled at my clients to ease the tension and curiosity buzzing within the conference room.

I know as you read this, you are wondering who I am.

My name is Adeola Janet Aderemi, now Mrs. Adeola Janet Coker. I am married to one of the youngest CEO in the country.

 Olanrewaju Coker is his name. Lanre, as he is popularly called, is the only son and child of Senator Coker and Mrs. Coker. I smile wistfully as I reminisce a little about the man I fell in love with.

Lanre is over 6 ft. tall, with alert light brown eyes. He has a pointed nose which suits his long face and naturally red colored bow lips which compliments his fair skin. 

His black curly hair gave away his Caucasian descendant. I can’t decide if it was love at first sight, especially with the circumstance.

Most ladies wish to be in my position, I would gladly trade my position as his wife with any lady. 

I never wish to relive the incident. The incident which has led to a pregnancy — wanted or unwanted?

I sigh mournfully, the darkness of the incident threatens to swallow me. How do I broach the subject with him? 

Would I find him in a cheerful mood tonight? Does he have to know? Or should I keep the secret to myself, but for how long?

I resolve within myself to tell him…he has to know. Tonight.

 

#Diary Series

#Shattered Hope

#Diary of an abused Wife

 

Written by Okusun Mercy

SHATTERED HOPE

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THE PAST
Episode 1

The proposal came unexpectedly, I am still reeling from the proposal shock. I can’t believe it…I choose not to believe it. 

The white gold engagement ring, which felt heavy on my finger, is the stark proof that he did propose to me.

My younger sisters have been “ooh-ing” and “aah-ing” over the engagement ring.

If only they knew!

It has indeed been a night of utter surprise, who knew a date night would turn into a proposal night. My mother can’t stop beaming, as her first child and daughter, she is excited to know that I am getting married. 

As I stare at her smiling face, it dawned on me that I haven’t seen my mother smile in a while, since she lost her husband, my father. Her infectious laughter threatens to contaminate me, but I refuse to celebrate in this sham engagement.

My mother noticed I wasn’t smiling, she raises her eyebrow in question at me, and I shrugged in reply. I gave her a little smile and looked down at my finger where the ostentatious ring rested. The ring seems to be mocking me, it seems to say: this is the price for your silence.

The humiliation burns as the images threatens to erupt, I close my eyes to prevent it. I am not strong enough, the images spills from my memory and flashes across as tears rolled down my face.

“Deola” I heard my mother’s soft worried voice call out to me.

“Are you alright?” she asked in concern, I opened my eyes and our gazes locked. I saw concern in her brown eyes, she looked worried and scared. I parted my lips to speak, but no sound came forth.

How do I explain? How do I tell her? I asked myself these questions as her worried eyes roved over my face. My younger sisters had been alerted to my present state and I watched their happiness dim slowly.

“Sister Deola, are you alright?” Bisola, the youngest, asked. I sighed and closed my eyes in shame.

How do I tell them?

How do I tell my mother that her future son-in-law…

… Raped me.

#Diary Series.

#Shattered Hope

#Diary of an Abused Wife.

 

Written by Okusun Mercy.